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In Dreams I Will Protect You - Written By: FrodosFantasy
SUMMARY: This is set during the Quest, some time after Frodo and Sam have left the company to travel on their own.  Frodo has a few dark moments, and Sam does his best to keep himself awake by remembering his past and fondest memories with Frodo.   

Febuary 29, 3019

Frodo's hands shook a little involuntarily as he stood leaning wearily next to the rocks. Sam was asleep peacefully on the ground close to where he stood, but Frodo felt that he could not sit down at all or else he would fall asleep. He kept hearing whispers in the darkness around him, something that he could only hear if he kept as still as he could. So, he kept moving around, walking to and fro, singing slightly to himself. He kept hoping Sam would wake up and tell him that it was just his imagination, or everything would be allright. But he didn't. He slept on soundlessly, and with a smile on his face like he was dreaming pleasant thoughts. It was well after the time he should have woken Sam he knew, but upon looking at his sleeping form, he hadn't the heart to wake him. For another moment, Frodo watched him with love in his heart, but suddenly he heard the voices again, so he turned away to try and stare into the darkness.

The world swayed and he fell to the ground floor, his hands falling sharply on the rock below. He winced in pain, but seemed unwilling to get up from where he was. If only his vision would clear and the scenery would stop spinning...then everything would be just fine. But it didn't. He wasn't aware of the blood dripping from his hands from where he had cut himself on the rocks, just of the constant spin of things. The spinning was making his head ache terribly. He put his hands to his head, trying to stop himself from dizziness. Then he shut his eyes tightly, and shouted in his head, "No No! Stop! Stop it please!"

In less than an instant Sam was at his side. "MrFrodo? Is everything all right?" He saw that Frodo still had his eyes shut tightly, and gently touched his face trying to will his eyes to open. Sam went to look at him closer, and saw the blood on his hands and now face too. He gave an involuntary gasp, and touched Frodo's cheek softly. But though Frodo's eyes relaxed slightly, he didn't open them yet. He didn't think he could. "Now MrFrodo...what have you done here?," asked Sam softly. He took Frodo's hands in his own, and pulled them away from his head, gently and lovingly. "Oh your poor hands...," he said in looking at them closely. He stoked them gently, and then he turned away for a moment, to grab from his pack a cloth he had kept. He dipped it in the stream that ran beside their camp site, and brought it to Frodo's face.

Frodo jumped a little, as if waking from sleep suddenly, and was able to open his eyes. At first, all he saw was dark, but then slowly, Sam swam into his view. Sam was watching him carefully, and smiled a little in relief when he saw Frodo's blank eyes gain recognition of who he was. "Sam...," Frodo whispered. "Yes MrFrodo...your Sam...and I see you didn't yet wake me when you should have..." He took his hands and placed the cloth on them carefully. Frodo took a quick breath of air, and Sam eased the pressure he kept, and watched Frodo's face relax a little. "I...I didn't want to wake you just yet. You looked so peaceful when you were sleeping there...I hadn't the heart to wake you.  I had hoped you would be able to get a bit more sleep." Sam smiled and went to sit closer to Frodo, leaning Frodo's head on his shoulder and still keeping Frodo's hands in his own. They sat there silently for a moment, with their backs to the rock face, and then Sam added, "Well...just the same my dear were much more tired than you thought. You need sleep as well you know." Frodo sighed and closed his eyes. "I know Sam. Forgive me."

Another moment or two of silence, before Sam spoke quietly again. "Any sign of...of him?" "I don't know for certain Sam. I...was hearing lots of things for a time there...but I don't think it was...him." "Oh?," asked Sam curiously. But Frodo shuddered and shook his head. He fell silent and did not continue...for he fell asleep.

Sam kept hold of Frodo in the darkness, letting him sleep feeling comforted and warm at the same time. His thoughts went out briefly to those they had left behind, and in the darkness shivered slightly as he wondered what had happened to them.  He hoped they were allright, and because his thoughts were those of hope, he suddenly visioned briefly the prospect of coming home to the Shire after some time.  And to his delight, he saw in his vision that Merry and Pippin would be there waiting for them with smiling faces and open arms. It was a good thought, and it left Sam hopeful for the safety of their friends, as well as Frodo and himself. He sighed happily from this vision, and carefully moved a little so that Frodo's arm was draped over him. It gave Sam the feeling of being surrounded by love, and he knew that no one would be able to touch Frodo without him knowing just in case he fell back asleep. He yawned sleepily, trying to drag sleep from his eyes. He looked up to the stars, but they seemed wrong somehow. It wasn't the same vision they had in the Shire on so many nights ago. He remembered tramping through wild bushes and vines with Frodo, trying to find the best spot the see the most stars. They were happy thoughts, and Sam hugged Frodo and kissed his hair softly, trying his best not to wake him and feel his presence at the same time. It seemed so different now that they were alone. But for Sam, it was even more special because they were. He loved Frodo with all his hobbit heart, and being alone with him was something that Sam always thought was very pleasnt indeed. It was something that Sam always had dreamed of, walking through the woods with Bilbo and Frodo when he was younger. Being able to go off with Frodo and go on adventures with him because he didn't want to be left behind...and bringing him back home when the adventures were over.

Sam continued to watch Frodo as he slept...and was thankful that his sleep seemed sound and deep. Several hours had passed, and Sam had kept his mind awake and alert by thinking of different memories he had shared with Frodo. Some before the Ring, and some even after. But all of them were pleasant, because in the end, Frodo would be with him and everything would be okay. And Sam thought that as long as Frodo were with him, everything would be. He remembered things that Frodo had done for him...been there to teach him. And always it seemed like he himself did not have the courage, Frodo showed him always that he had nothing to fear. Remembering every day of his writing lessons, learning only because MrBilbo was the most wonderful person to learn from and always eager to teach him anything. And of course MrFrodo had been there as well, smiling at him in encouragement, giving him the confidence to go on trying.  One time especially, Sam had been very dissapointed because he had not gotten something right, but Frodo gave him such a smile, that he instantly felt better.  Perhaps it was the way MrFrodo had laid his hand gently on his arm, "Don't worry Sam...You'll learn. But it takes time, and that you must be able to give yourself. I have faith in you Sam...everything will turn out just the way you want...just trust me, and I promise you, I won't let you give up on yourself or your dreams."

Sam sighed with happiness, and then his mind drifted again. But this time is was to the horrible time when he had the most terrible nightmare he could have ever imagined. It had just dark shapes, and he and Frodo had been out in the woods, but then suddenly one of the shapes just enveloped Frodo, and he vanished completely. Sam was in terror. He didn't know what to do. His thought was no longer of the shapes, but of Frodo. He ran and ran, calling for Frodo, and finally he woke with a start and wasn't quite aware of everything being safe. With a sob, he had gotten up and left his house, still dressed like he was. He ran the entire way to Frodo's, arriving breathlessly and yet quietly. He opened the back door with his key given to him by Bilbo himself so he might be able to come whenever he liked, and crept silently down the hallway to Frodo's bedroom. He had to know...he had to be certain that Frodo was still there...still perfectly fine. And when Sam opened the door even as his hand was shaking still, he saw that Frodo was soundly asleep. There was a light around him from the moonlight that came through the window, but he still slept peacefully, dreaming pleasant thoughts. A sob of relief escaped from Sam, and Frodo had woken instantly, alarmed to see Sam there dressed as he was and shaking and sobbing. "Sam...what happened? Are you allright?" And Sam went to Frodo's bedside, and fell against him, "Oh...Frodo...," he sobbed into Frodo's arms. "'s's allright now. You've had some nightmares, and that I can see.  But don't you worry now, it's over and I won't let them harm you anymore," Frodo had said, squeezing Sam a little. "But it wasn't just a dream was much more...I know it was," said Sam, whispering a little, and sniffling. "Not just a dream Sam?" "No...I would have gone to my Gaffer, but he just laughed at me last time and told me to go back to sleep. But it's real...I know it's real. I've had dreams like that...where I know it's not just a comes true later on in some form or another!," he said shakily as he squeezed Frodo harder in rememberance of his nightmares.

Frodo said nothing for a moment, comforting Sam as best he could. In his silence, he thought of the way Sam had dropped the MrFrodo to just Frodo.  In fear and trust, all barriers had been dropped, but Frodo found that he did not mind it at all.  "I'm so sorry Sam. And I know how you feel...for I've had dreams like that as well. But one thing I have learned is that you can't let it control you. You can't be afraid of what is to come Sam. It has to be, for fate has fordained it...," "No!," Sam said, shaking his head savagely and holding onto Frodo for dear life. He was afraid of it. Afraid of what was to be. He couldn't let that happen...not to Frodo! " dear Sam. What will be will be. And there's nothing that we can do to prevent things from happening that we don't wish. And believe me because I do know, and I've tried. But...if we are constantly afraid and waiting for the worst to come...then our lives are lost. Lost to fear and worry and hatred of ourselves because there's nothing we can do. You miss so much Sam - so much of life and what it has to offer. And it has so much to offer very much." Sam sighed and was silent for a while, while Frodo stayed holding onto him and being of silent comfort. Then after a time, Sam sighed and asked as his tears started falling heavily again, "But...what if the dreams are about the people we there nothing we can do Frodo? I...don't want anything like that to happen...not at all. I can't let it Frodo...I can't." Frodo waited a moment for Sam's sobs to grow quieter, and then he turned Sam to face him and wiped his tears away softly with a brush of his hand.  It was more of a caress than anything else, and the feeling of it made Sam sigh and shiver slightly with the feeling of love it gave him.  Briefly he thought that if he would die, than this was the place he would want to be.  With MrFrodo so close, and his their arms wrapped around each other.  It made him close his eyes on tears for the thought of it, and opened them only when Frodo kissed his tears softly away.  His eyes were so blue and bright, and then he said in a whisper, "Then we must hold those we love close to our hearts every day we live Sam. So that we know we've done everything we can to show them that love. And that is a very blessed thing love someone so much that they know it always and love you in return. So that your life isn't wasted in fear Sam, but grows with love." Sam remembered even now, smiling up at Frodo with hope in his eyes. He held onto Frodo greatfully, and said with a quiet whisper, "Could I stay with you Frodo? For tonight...please?" And he remembered Frodo's smile, saying nothing at first, but just quietly gathering Sam and taking him underneath the blankets with him. "There we are Sam...and don't be afraid. I'll be here with you if you have another nightmare...and I won't ever laugh...I promise." Sam remembered sighing with happiness, hardly believing that he was here with MrFrodo alone.  It had been only a wish in his deepest dreams, but now here it was reality, and it was even more a blessing than Sam could have ever wished.  He shivered again slightly, bringing himself to wrap his arms closer around Frodo's waist.  "Thank you for letting me stay here with you Frodo."  And Frodo had just sighed a bit, and said, "Goodnight my dear Sam."  "Goodnight,"  Sam remembered saying.  He had been silent for a time, content to be with Frodo and having their arms wrapped around one another.  His eyes closed and he took all thoughts of the dream away.  It had been quiet and wonderful, so Sam had thought Frodo asleep when he added with a whisper,  "I love you very much.  I don't know what I'd ever do if anything happened to you."  But his ultimate suprise had come when Frodo had answered, "I love you too Sam, and I know.  But try not to think about such things.  Just remember that I'm here with you now, and that's all that matters.  Even if the future should bring darkness Sam, I want you always to be able to remember this moment of us being here together...and you will remember that the darkness will fade in time."  And even though years and years had now passed by, that night was still one of the most beautiful memories Sam remembered.

But for some reason, it stirred his heart so much that tears started falling down his cheeks. And unknown to Sam, Frodo knew something was wrong, and woke instantly. "What is it Sam?," he asked, holding onto him a little tighter. "I...was just remembering...Frodo...," Sam said, wiping his tears a little, and hugging Frodo. "Remembering Sam?," Frodo asked with a slight smile on his face. "Yes...remembering. Do you remember Frodo...that night I had those nightmares?" Frodo closed his eyes, and his grip on Sam tightened a little in comfort. "Yes I do. You were very much afraid of them, weren't you? I remember waking up suddenly and seeing you stand there, looking as sad and as scared as could be, and at once I just felt like something terrible had happened and you needed to not be alone for a while." "Yes that was it Frodo. That was just it." "Did you have another one of those nightmares Sam?," Frodo asked in concern, his blue eyes catching the moonlight and giving off little sparkles in Sam's own green ones. " Frodo...," Sam sighed, gripping Frodo's arms around him and scooting down to lay down more against the rock face. "I...just wanted you to know that I remembered it. It was a beautiful memory and the first time I actually was able to lie next to you. I felt so comforted and warm Frodo...I was able to fall asleep right away with the thought of being there so close to you and safe," he said, kissing Frodo's cheek softly and hugging him. Frodo waited a moment, remembering the time, and then he sighed a little. "I didn't," he confessed. "No?," asked Sam, at once worried. "No. I felt warm and very well loved Sam of course, but I didn't sleep right away. I was...worried about you, about if you were going to be allright. I wanted you to be able to sleep without nightmares," Frodo said quietly.

Sam was silent for a moment, and then he turned over so that he was leaning over Frodo, and without unwrapping him from his grasp. "I was Frodo. Because of you, I've been able to live, and not to worry about what the future may bring. Just like I know that MrMerry and MrPippin are just fine, I know that we will be as well, as long as we're together." Frodo smiled as Sam planted a soft lingering kiss on his cheek, and sighed contentedly. "I'm glad you know that Sam...and I'm glad you said it. It makes me much more comforted knowing that you believe it." And Sam sighed a little, and still having his arms about Frodo, he layed his head against his shoulder, sheltering him from breeze and harm at the same time. And Frodo was awake for some while, thinking about the things of the past. At all times, he felt surrounded by love and care, and especially when Sam had been with him. So even in the dark outside, being alone together in a strange land, Frodo still felt loved and safe and warm despite the cold. He stayed for a while, stroking his hand along Sam's arm, and eventually, both of them fell into deep dreamless sleep.


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